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Archive for the ‘Comedy’ Category

Yes, Barack Obama ended up beating John McCain rather easily one year ago, but given Stephen Colbert didn’t stay in the race for the White House or Obama could have really been in trouble (for a minute or two, anyway). So on this anniversary day, allow me to recall Colbert’s tentative entry into the 2008 race and what might-have-been. Remember, Obama did not start surging until Colbert suddenly pulled out of the race for the White House — or was booted out. And recall that Colbert ended up pulling out of the primaries despite topping Bill Richardson and closing in on Joe Biden in one national poll. Maybe if he’d stay in it would be Vice President Colbert today. He had kicked it off during an appearance on Larry King’s show in October 2007 to promote his new book, I Am America (And So Can You) . The Comedy Central star was accused by the host of using the book as a platform to run for president. Colbert happily confirmed this, saying that he would likely seek the nomination from both parties. When King said this was a “cop out,” Colbert said that it actually demonstrated true “courage” because “I could lose twice.” Likely he would launch his grassroots crusade in his native state, South Carolina, as a “favorite son.” Colbert refused to knock any of his competitors, but did allow that Fred Thompson’s campaign slogan should be, “Do Not Disturb.” He pointed out that Mike Huckabee had already offered him the veep spot if the former Arkansas governor got the GOP nomination. Soon, a major South Carolina public TV station offered Colbert airtime to officially announce his candidacy. The Colbert bump kept growing when, on October 14, Maureen Dowd turned over her New York Times column to him for the day. Colbert revealed, “While my hat is not presently in the ring, I should also point out that it is not on my head. So where’s that hat?” Keeping nothing under his missing hat, he went on to describe his platform. On gender: “The sooner we accept the basic differences between men and women, the sooner we can stop arguing about it and start having sex.” On race: “While skin and race are often synonymous, skin cleansing is good, race cleansing is bad.” On the elderly: “They look like lizards.” And finally: “I don’t intend to tease you for weeks the way Newt Gingrich did, saying that if his supporters raised $30 million, he would run for president. I would run for $15 million. Cash. Nevertheless, I am not ready to announce yet — even though it’s clear that the voters are desperate for a white, male, middle-aged, Jesus-trumpeting alternative.” Two nights later, after nearly a solid week of dropping hints, Colbert did find, and throw, his hat in the ring. On his own show, The Colbert Report , with balloons falling, he screamed, ‘Yes, I’m doing it!” Then he welcomed CBS political analyst Jeff Greenfield to analyze his impact on the race “in the past three minutes.” Greenfield said it was “astounding.” Colbert took out one of the “Colbert/Stewart 2008″ bumper stickers that have circulated for awhile and cut out the Stewart part, saying that he might replace Jon Stewart as a possible vice president with someone named “Huckabee” or even “Putin.” To finance his campaign, he threatened to sell advertising patches on his suit, like a NASCAR driver. Questions quickly rose about his ballot status in South Carolina but the situation there appeared murky. Stewart signed a contract extension for his Daily Show , explaining, “I love doing this show… I look forward to using this extension to having great fun at President Colbert’s expense.” Stephen, in fact, was already threatening to overtake the lesser-rans on the Democratic side. The Public Opinion Strategies national poll in mid-October found him drawing 2.3 percent in the Democratic race. This put his ahead of Richardson (2.1 percent) and Dennis Kucininch (2.1). He trailed Biden by just a tad (the future Veep polled 2.7 percent). A week later a Rasmussen poll showed that his surge was continuing. In a projected three-way context against frontrunner Hillary Clinton and Rudy Giuliani he was pulling 13% of the vote (28% of the 18-to-29 demo). At E&P we predicted: “If he keeps gaining over 10% a week, Colbert should be leading the field before November is out.” Meanwhile, a Facebook group titled “1,000,000 Strong For Stephen T. Colbert” had attracted more than 880,000 members in just over a week — making it the most popular political group on Facebook by far. And that was before he, improbably, appeared on Meet the Press with Tim Russert on October 21. From the transcript: RUSSERT: You’ve thought this through. COLBERT: That’s a generous estimation. Thank you. RUSSERT: The press reaction to your announcement has been mixed. Here’s one headline. COLBERT: OK. RUSSERT: This was on Thursday. “Electile Dysfunction: Colbert Running For President.” COLBERT: That’s good work. That’s good work. RUSSERT: Are they, are they questioning, shall we say, your stamina? COLBERT: I don’t know. I think a lot of people are asking whether — they say is this, is this real, you know? And to which I would say to everybody, this is not a dream, OK? You’re not going to wake up from this, OK? I’m, I’m, I’m far realer than Sam Brownback, let me put it that way. RUSSERT: Would you consider Senator Larry Craig as your running mate? COLBERT: I would. RUSSERT: Have you had conversations with him? COLBERT: Define conversation. RUSSERT: Have you spoken to him? COLBERT: No, no. RUSSERT: Have you met with him? Have you been in the same room together? COLBERT: Sorry, my lawyer’s telling me to say no more. Colbert visited Columbia, S.C. and received the key to the city from the mayor on “Stephen Colbert Day.” The local newspaper, The State , published a side-by-side comparison of its two native son candidates, Colbert and John Edwards. The latter’s hair was described as “naturally fluffy” while Colbert’s was “very stiff.” Colbert, perhaps angered by that, was quoted saying of his opponent: “John Edwards left South Carolina when he was 1 year old. He had his chance. Saying his parents moved him — that’s the easy answer.” But just as momentum was building uncontrollably in early November, the state’s Democratic party ruled that he was not “viable” enough to be awarded a spot on the ballot. Colbert was reduced to citing — and showing on the screen — an article in E&P to prove that he was, indeed, not merely a joke candidate for president. The audience roared its approval of E&P as potential kingmaker. Too bad, he said, he wouldn’t get a chance to run, waving a thick file of papers — he had an exit strategy for Iraq all mapped out. Greg Mitchell is editor of Editor & Publisher His book, “Why Obama Won,” was the first look at the entire 2008 campaign from a progressive perspective. More on Barack Obama

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Greg Mitchell: Obama Won Last Year Only Because Stephen Colbert Dropped Out!

Certain cinema always seems to get the spotlight in the States, be it French or Polish or whatever is in vogue at the moment. At the same time, a lot of other national cinema gets overlooked. In this month and in November, Czech cinema will no longer seem overlooked. One independent programmer Laura Blum has not only become quite expert in the cinema of the Czech Republic, but in putting together The Ironic Curtain for the Film Society of Lincoln Center, she has managed to offer through its filmmakers an enlightening look at a country that has taken on a new life in the wake of the Iron Curtain’s collapse 20 years ago. During a relatively peaceful and bloodless six-week period of demonstrations– between November 17 and December 29, 1989 — the former Czechoslovakia saw the overthrow of the Soviet regime that became known as the Velvet Revolution. Explains programmer Blum, “Americans tend to think the Velvet Revolution happened far away, without any connection to us, but leader Vclav Havel was in New York on April 4, 1968, the day Martin Luther King was assassinated. He says he was influenced by the non-violent philosophy he heard at the rallies honoring Dr. King at Central Park – which he would ultimately bring to the Velvet Revolution.” In fact, The Ironic Curtain opens with the North American premiere of Pavel Kouteck and Miroslav Janek’s intimate documentary about the private and public life of playwright turned president Citizen Havel . The film captures the life of the man who emblemizes the Velvet Revolution as well as the individual and collective yearnings of recent Czech history. Czech Consul General Elika igov introduces the film. And the film is preceded bya special video of the former president, exclusively made for this series. A later tragedy in 1968 inspired The Ferrari Dino Girl (Holka Ferrari Dino) by New Wave enfant terrible Jan N?mec. The docudrama recalls the filmmaker’s rush across the Czechoslovak-Austrian border to deliver footage of Soviet tanks ramrolling through Prague. Though Soviet propaganda later claimed the Czechs welcomed Warsaw Pact troops, N?mec’s footage — which will ring a bell for anyone who saw The Unbearable Lightness of Being — provided visceral refutation of such a thought. This deliberately timed 68-minute film shares a double bill with Ji? St?echa and Petr Slavk’s The Kind Revolution (N?n revoluce) . Cinema is at its verite best in this chronicle of the Velvet Revolution when riot police quashed a peaceful student rally in Prague, the popular protests that followed sacked Czech Communism. Czech film history also appears in four classics from the ’60s and one from the ’30s in this series. Gustav Machat’s Extse offers the first nude scenes in cinema with a quick glimpse of the young Heddy Lamar skinny dipping; Voyage to the End of the Universe is a sci-fi gem that was an influence on the makers of Star Trek ; Milos Forman’s Loves of a Blonde is an early example of the New Wave as seen through Czech eyes. The New Wave influenced a younger generation of filmmakers–for instance, director Bohdan Slama –who made the acclaimed Something Like Happiness (which is also screening during the series) says Forman’s Black Peter was among his biggest influences. Also included in this fest is a 19-minute sneak preview clip of Czech Peace (?esk mir ), Filip Remunda and Vit Klusk’s “pre-war comedy” about recent US plans to install a radar base on Czech soil. These two did a fabulous mockumentary called Czech Dream that debuted at 2005’s Tribeca Film Festival. And there are two Dostoevsky-inspired films, including Saa Gedeon’s The Return of the Idiot (Nvrat idiota) with top starlet Ana Geislerova, who sadly had to cancel an appearance here to introduce it, as well as her starrer Something Like Happiness . Variety singled out its director Slama, as among the top 10 directors to watch in 2009. The series closes on October 29 with the North American premiere of Petr Zelenka’s Karamazovi . The Dostoevsky classic is currently in the news with Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s praise, in Moscow, for the book’s attack on dogma. Similarly, New York will soon see the Czech attack on certainty in The Ironic Curtain. For more information go to: filmlinc.com

70c20114fe%C6%92.jpg 69x150 Brad Balfour: The Ironic Curtain   a Czech Film Series    Comes To New York

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Brad Balfour: The Ironic Curtain –a Czech Film Series — Comes To New York

Germans Trying To Pronounce Massachusetts (VIDEO)

Posted by Giggi On October - 15 - 2009

Via Buzzfeed comes this adorable video made by German people for German people with German people trying to say the word “Massachusetts.” It doesn’t go awesomely. WATCH: Get HuffPost Comedy On Facebook and Twitter! More on Video

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Germans Trying To Pronounce Massachusetts (VIDEO)

Dean Obeidallah: The Muslims are Coming!

Posted by Giggi On October - 15 - 2009

Not only are Muslims coming — but they want to take over America! At least that’s what four Republican Members of Congress alleged today . Representatives John Shadegg (Ariz.), Paul Broun (Ga.), Trent Franks (Ariz.) and Sue Myrick (N.C.) are alarmed because they found Muslims trying to lobby Congress. Can you believe that? Muslims-Americans actually want to have input into the American political system! Thank God (a/k/a Allah) that we have these four Congressional watch dogs on the job being paid with our tax dollars to warn of the Muslims dastardly plan to influence legislation. These elected “officials” timed their allegation to coincide with the release of the book: Muslim Mafia: Inside the Secret Underworld that’s Conspiring to Islamize America , written by Dave Gaubatz — a man who claimed last year that a vote for “Hussein Obama is a vote for Sharia Law.” Now I want to digress for a moment to say that a “Muslim Mafia” does sound cool on some level. Americans love mafia shows so this “Muslim Mafia” could inspire the first show on US TV to star Muslims. Or maybe I like the term “Muslim Mafia” so much because my father is Muslim and my Mom is Sicilian. With this pedigree, I’m a shoe-in for a top position in the “Muslim Mafia.” Back to the real issue: Are Muslims really trying to take over America? Most estimates indicate that there are 3-4 million Muslims in the United States. In order for Muslims to take over, simple math says they have to be at least 50 percent of the 300 million Americans. As of now, Muslims are still about 147 million people short. In an effort to speed up the Muslim take over of America — which on some level would probably help my comedy career because I’ll get even more bookings by Muslim groups — my fellow Arab-American comedians Aron Kader and Maysoon Zayid went out to the streets of NYC with me to see if we could recruit Americans to Islam. (We did this a little while back when we first heard this allegation.) We offered prizes to people to convert to Islam, such as a toaster, a blender and even Sudoku. Here is a clip of our efforts to convert Americans!

Originally posted here:
Dean Obeidallah: The Muslims are Coming!

Chinese Guy on MTV CRIBS!

Posted by Giggi On October - 3 - 2009

Peter Chao do his own version of popular TV show MTV Cribs where the rich white asshole walk around their house and show off their fancy light chandelier. Also they walk around be an asshole so now Peter Chao be an asshole too! My house not so much like big asshole house but is better than old shitty apt. Good enough so the mudabitch will like come over

http://www.youtube.com/v/26WDYkEBbr4?f=videos&app=youtube_gdata

2 Chinese Guy on MTV CRIBS!

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Chinese Guy on MTV CRIBS!

McDonald' s: Rapporteur

Posted by Giggi On January - 9 - 2009
GoRemy asked:


Het beste deel van het maken van deze video was het feit ik kreeg om de steunen te eten. Behalve het gebottelde water. I' m een de kopsoort van het Grimas kerel.

Voel vrij om de andere video’s in te tekenen en te controleren! I' ll ga door en omvat hier de lyrische gedichten tot ik hen op de plaats zette.

Sittin' op de laag met de ochtendpost
Met een koude kop van koffie en wat boring toost
Thinkin' I' m-a veranderen het omhoog, ja that' s altijd pret
Wat u berekent, Remz? Een McDonald' s looppas

Zo raken wij de laagkussens, vereisen sommige dollars, vriend
Yo, vond ik vijf. Mens, that' s Canadees.
Hoe ' periode een loonie? Een twonie? Een lepel of Goonies?
Oh, it' s 10:25. De kerel, u kreeg zich te bewegen, G.

Kreeg het contante geld, kreeg de auto, kreeg het pedaal aan de vloer
Snelheid limit' s 25, maar I' m dat 34 doet
Gaand aandrijving-drive-thru stijl, mens it' snel uitdrukkelijk s
U kunt het trans vet roepen, roep ik het geluk

Broodje tot tellerfella met een minuut aan reserveonderdelen
Frenchy met een hoofdtelefoon, " kan ik uw orde nemen? "
Een McGriddle met een weinig zoet en zuur daar, zoon
Een McMuffin, dan is stuffin' muffins omhoog in mijn boomstam

Dan een dienblad of twee van hotcakes, mens I can' t beslist, uh
All' s dat ik geraakt=wordt= hen dingen met Tante Jemimah heb geweten
Hoe ' periode een eifajita voor ??n of ander aroma van Texas
Geen drama maar mijn mamma willen een ontbijtongezuurd broodje

Don' t vergeet mijn #4, of there' ll ben te besteden hel
En ik wil hen eieren stroopte als een olifant
Frenchy terug op de lijn, " is dat al uw orde? "
Geen het ain' t, dwaas, wil ik Coca-Cola!

Krijg mijn kop van Cokes en I' m-a beginnen een rel
Cuz op het kopdeksel, kerel drukte &quot in; diet"
Controleer zijn overhemdsmarkering, en ik vang de naam
Brian, I ain' t tryin' aan drankaspartame

Sittin' voor de laag, ' periode een later uur
Pickin' bij een zak van ??n of andere nu n' Laters
Nauwelijks verhongerend, mens, maar ik vind een voorgevoel
Begin snel de auto omhoog omdat it' s tijd voor lunch

Het neemt enkel twee bokken en ik krijg wat de behoefte van I
Twee rundvleespasteitjes, speciale saus, sla, kaas
" Supersize Me" bovengenoemde he' s had genoeg van het
Maar hoe het slecht voor mijn hart als I' is; m in liefde met het?

Als u nooit McDonald' had; s, heck, goed kerel u zou moeten
It' S.A. partij, zoals een Hardee' s, behalve het voedsel is goed
Enkel don' t krijgt grote #2, pleit ik met u vriend
Cuz it' ll ben grote #2 wanneer u het opnieuw ziet

Ga de opslag in, eerst u holla, toen u
Pluk een paarpunten van het dollarmenu
Vier hete McNuggets, dessert met vla
Meng zoete n' verzuur met een straal van mosterd.

Een grote aanval van MAC, u kan maximum de sla
Het betalen van ain' t een pijn, nemen zij contant geld of krediet
Wil een water? U kunt daar voor de lente betalen
Of krijg de vrije kop van het Grimas–hoe verwarrend

Zij zeggen, " you' het re spelen met een hartstilstand, mijn boy"
Ding slechts slecht voor mijn heart' s wanneer zij mijn stuk speelgoed vergeten
Nu I' m-a hebben een milkshake, maar alvorens u raast en tieren
It' s dat van klavers wordt gemaakt–nu ' S.A. installatie

De mensen zeggen it' slecht s, maar I don' t gelooft hen
McDonald' s is vrede–vraag enkel Tom Friedman
De mamma’s vangen me met een ' zine, en she' s dat &quot gilt; einde!
Don' t u zich, Mamma, it' ongerust maakt; s enkel mijn mens Ray Kroc

Dank aan dubzattic voor slaat!

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carcape93 asked:


unas caiditas de cada Cosa

Betrunkene Affen

Posted by Giggi On January - 8 - 2009
irishmonkey13 asked:


i' trauriges m, aber Sie mssen HERAUF Ihr Volumen sich DREHEN.

gioca gioue bergamo

Posted by Giggi On January - 8 - 2009
asevado asked:


quello che ^^

Taco Bell Rap

Posted by Giggi On January - 8 - 2009
WahtayProductions asked:


!!!!!!!!! LYRICS !!!!!!!!!!!! (geschreven door: ryan deberry) Ik moet twee hoogste tacos en houd de zure room It makes me overgeven en het is een lelijk scne een kip quesadilla en taco salade, te dit is hoe we in het station via Ik heb een pittige kip dubbele Decker chili kaas wrap grote cokes, fles water, vergeet dan niet de dop Ik moet twee zachte tacos en een enchurrito niet te denken dat het allemaal voor mij al "yo QUEIRO Taco Bell" mijn jongen zei tegen mij dus ik zal hem een Chalupa en een gratis. Ik hoop dat u bereid bent om dit allemaal vast, je zit er zonder een gedegen hete saus, ik moet dat ook, maakt het drie, geen twee maken het grote cokes, ik moet dat ook, een voor mij en voor jou just kidding, wordt mooi (En vergeet ook niet de GELE RIJST!) gele rijst, hij wil dat ook, is dat iets wat jullie doen? indien niet nachos alstublieft, houdt u de sla, voeg de kaas een meer holla voor een dollar dit mijn bemanning in dit station door middel van een ding, give it to me baby veroorzaken WE honger. Brandon Epling op toetsenborden, Brian Lugo op beat box en Ryan Deberry op Lyrics …………( daarvoor) … Taco Bell Rap. Hope you enjoy.

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